I slept with the mother of my child, the girlfriend and a slapper in less than 36 hours ....

But in my defence i was keeping them all happy ...

I have killed someone.

In fact, more than one.

But it is OK.

I was doing God's work at the time and they were non believers.

Im going to secretly enjoy the Eastenders xmas special more than the Queens speech.. (much more in fact!!) Mwah ha ha ha ha ha haaaaa!

Is Satan a Jealous God? I can't remember.

If he is not, I may take one of the figurines from the nativity scene and start to worship it too.

Even if it does smell a bit funny.

The donkey would be too obvious. I think I'll choose the lamb, purely for the irony, of course. But is this the right thing to do ...?

Satan guide me!

Satan is more of an angel than a god.

Is he not Jesus's brother excommunicated from heaven for banging some of the holy virgins ...

Reagardless any high jinxed tomfoolery ridiculing the Lord will be acceptable...

I have been considering my idea to start worshiping the lamb out of the nativity scene, and in retrospect it is a stupid idea.

For one it is just a porcelain lamb and actually represents nothing. For another, I really do not want to piss Satan off.

For that reason I have decided to make an alter to Satan himself. I did some sketches of an Icon that I was going to use for Satan, but they all turned-out rubbish, but then I had an other idea:

I am sure that I have a cardboard cut-out of Darth Vader somewhere in the loft. I am going to make some cardboard horns (with black marker - see it will work brilliantly) and stick them on his helmet. I will clear a little area in the loft and make a prayer space.

And tonight I shall offer prayers to Satan and his great prophet jizzmes.

I Hail Satan (IHS)
PTL!

Declan,

No you must repent and be a good boy - Santa gives presents to good boys in this world not just silly promises for when you are dead.

Turn to Santa ho ho ho.

PS It's about time we forgot about all this religious nonsense and returned to the true christmas spirit - getting pissed, eating too much and getting presents - wouldn't want to spoil christmas with some religious fools jumping on Santa's patch - ho ho ho.

This shi'ite ar sole in the red suit is so thick as the Shi'ite he drops every where, appears not to be able to do anagrams.
Whee its me
Real Rocky
so fcuk to thee you pis spot
DB

Dear Satan.

I really do need some guidance on this. I am new to satanism and don't want to look a fool.

I have another idea for a sin, but I am not sure if it qualifies:

Basically, so far as I recall, the old testament was jewish and joshua himself was born as a jew.

Would it be a sin to put some ham in the old testment?

Obviously I am trying to commit christian sin, not a sin in judaism. What would the point of that be?

Any help appreciated! Sorry for sounding like such a noob!